Near Earth Cheesecakeshop - "Let Them Eat Cake"

Wyrm 1066

Near Earth Cheesecakeshop - The Tools of Dessert


CheesecakeshopCheesecakeshop is a true NBN Combo.

It has fast advance

It wants to kill the runner

But there is no guarantee it won't be errata'd away

And it is MWL Legal

Unlike other Combo styles, Cheesecakeshop is actively fun and interactive!

It loves runner economies with the laissez-faire of 'MERICA, refunding the runner's cred-pools after riding the choo choo train into a delightful movie going experience for all.

If Butchershop is a house of meat, Cheesecakeshop is a glazed donut face ass looking for a toy store.

This is a decklist I've been tinkering with since before worlds and after many minutes of stuffing my face full of sweets, I've crafted this epicurean delight for all to enjoy. This list is surprisingly easy to pilot correctly (somewhere near Val DLR) but I've been able to push close to a 85% win rate against people who have never seen it before. Not to mention a Top 3 finish at a recent Store Championship!

Strategies and Card Choices


Scoring your first Breaking News - This deck wins by installing a Breaking News, putting two advancement counters on it before scoring it and saying 'BREAKING NEWS'. But as this is the last thing the runner wants you to do then you'll have to do it Turn 1 as they sit quietly in their seat because they don't get a turn before you and therefore CANNOT STOP YOU.

Feed the Runner Sweets - NEH wants to install all the things, the deck is built to consistently let you put things on the board for the runner to have a taste of. Daily Business Shows, Marked Accounts, Lily Lockwell. Keep putting them down and rezzing them after the runner has run them because freedom for everyone.

But the real strength of this deck is it's ability to 'Let it go'. Assets are rarely enough to satiate the runner's appetite, and once they've begun trashing what you put down, you'll need to give the people what they want.

A banging blockbuster! Yes, everyone wants to see a summer hit, feed them those Exploda's, 15 minutes, or even FOOD! Just not all at once of course, wouldn't want our runner getting too pudgy before the finale.

Dessert is served - Now that we've suckled the runners until they are fat and happy and can suckle no more, time for the finale. A magic show! Don't know any magic tricks you say? Well follow these simple instructions, performing audibles as needed.

The Opening Act: Biotic Labor (Optional)

The Pledge: Install Jackson Howard

The Turn: Turn over your entire deck with Power Shutdown

The Prestige: Accelerated Diagnostics 3 cards you shuffled back in with JH (Options: Interns, 24/7, Scorch, TA, SfSS)

The Encore: Accelerated Diagnostics again with the JH you Interns (Optional) (Options: Scorch, TA, SfSS)

Do not be surprised at the look of surprise on the runner's face. That is but the pure joy of someone who has experienced the true experience which is

CHEESECAKESHOP

20 comments
20 Jan 2016 bblum

Decklist of the week this shit immediately.

20 Jan 2016 greyfield

Imagine this post is the gif of Orson Welles applauding.

20 Jan 2016 LSK

This seems like one of those decks where you get R&D locked by an Anarch off two Mediums and just sit there and cry a little because they have I've Had Worse in their hand.

20 Jan 2016 Wyrm

@greyfield I got your back. Here was the original image before the theme was fully realized.

welles

20 Jan 2016 ethyachk

Is decklist of the century an option?

20 Jan 2016 PapaBear

Perfect in every way. The list is every bit as long as the Cheesecake Factory menu, which is as it should be.

20 Jan 2016 podoboyz99

Needs more Invasion of Privacy.

20 Jan 2016 Quicksilver

"refunding the runner's cred-pools after riding the choo choo train" looked like a Little Engine reference. But it's not there!

20 Jan 2016 d1en

I often cross the border to Buffalo with the girlfriend for Cheesecake Factory. Now that this deck exists, it'll be a constant reminder for Tiramsu. Raspberry think this White Chocolate has potential Reeses' Lemon Meringue. Strawberry banana carrot caramel pecan cherry cheesecake. 10/10

20 Jan 2016 Badeesh

The Edward Kim dream is getting realler (yes it's a word) by the day.

20 Jan 2016 Badeesh

Take my like, this is baller.

20 Jan 2016 AkAnderson

If people actually start using cheesecake as a name for a deck archetype, I will find you.

21 Jan 2016 pang4

How do you beat Plascrete, or a strong R&D lock? You only have 7 ICE total, so it's unlikely that you'll be able to tax a runner hitting you with a Medium or an R&D interface. If your jacksons are trashed, how do you win?

This deck seems like a glass cannon. Great when it works, but crumbles under pressure.

21 Jan 2016 Wyrm

@pang4 There are multiple options of beating Plascrete, depending on faction. If you're pretty confident they don't have IHW (Shaper), then you can full combo to deal 10 meat right through it.

R&D Lock has multiple answers, archangel being the most powerful. Generally runners are afraid to trash your assets given the threat of midseasons.

21 Jan 2016 Ehill

Glad to see you enjoyed the decklist so much ;D

21 Jan 2016 chill84

It may be premature but I rate this deck an 85%/cannot stop you

21 Jan 2016 podoboyz99

The problems I have encountered through some testing are;

1: Not enough economy (easily fixed) 2: Cant draw the second Diagnostics (not so easily fixed)

Have you encountered these issues @Wyrm? How do you solve them?

21 Jan 2016 Wyrm

@podoboyz99 Are you always going for the full combo? In general having all the pieces in hand isn't necessary. I'm not sure what MUs you are having those issues with during testing but, you want to react to what the runner thinks is happening.

Check the inspiration for.

21 Jan 2016 podoboyz99

Specificity I'm talking about noise. He gets the Wyldcakes engine going and I know he has at least 1 IHW in hand so I can't combo out without milling myself and risking a loss.

22 Jan 2016 PurinaBisonChow

@podoboyz99 The way I played this combo used two Traffic Accidents. If you're going for the kill against Anarch then you'd be setting up for a 10 meat damage combo and adjusting accordingly. Set it up so that you use one Traffic Accident in an Accelerated Diagnostics loop. If you don't hit an I've Had Worse, then you ONLY use the Scorched Earth in the next loop. If you (unfortunately) did hit an IHW, then your next loop will have two Traffic Accidents and a Scorched Earth and hope that the 8 meat damage is enough to put them down. If you hit a second IHW during the course of this process, well, then you just accept that you didn't get lucky enough to win.